You Are a Slave Owner

At least according to PETA I guess

A federal judge for the first time in U.S. history heard arguments Monday in a case that could determine whether animals enjoy the same constitutional protection against slavery as human beings.

U.S. District Judge Jeffrey Miller called the hearing in San Diego after Sea World asked the court to dismiss a lawsuit filed by People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals that names five orcas as plaintiffs in the case.

PETA claims the captured killer whales are treated like slaves for being forced to live in tanks and perform daily at its parks in San Diego and Orlando, Fla.

“This case is on the next frontier of civil rights,” said PETA’s attorney Jeffrey Kerr, representing the five orcas.

What’s hilarious is this is obviously crafted as best as possible to avoid it getting laughed out of court, as what’s the difference between keeping a Whale and keeping a dog? BTW I don’t know any PETA members, and honestly I have zero tolerance for them and their nonsense, but I did know some extremist vegetarians in my day, and one thing they all seem to have in common is keeping of pets. It can be VERY easy to anthropomorphize an animal who lives with you, and this is often a common vein in people who claim that somehow animals are people, or so like people that we need to do ridiculous things.

Still they’re talking WHALES not dogs. Only large parks like Sea World can afford to keep Orcas and other large marine mammals, so this can enervate the class warfare that has become very popular these days with the Kill the Jews groups camping out in public parks illegally.

Sea World’s attorney Theodore Shaw called the lawsuit a waste of the court’s time and resources. He said it defies common sense and goes against 125 years of case law applied to the Constitution’s 13th amendment that prohibits slavery between humans.

“With all due respect, the court does not have the authority to even consider this question,” Shaw said, adding later: “Neither orcas nor any other animal were included in the ‘We the people’ … when the Constitution was adopted.”

Well said. I hope this does get laughed out of court and PETA compensates Sea World for their time….and feeds several of their members to the whale.

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0 Responses to You Are a Slave Owner

  1. bluesun says:

    If my two miniature schnauzers are slaves, I think the humans are getting the worse end of the deal. The dogs don’t serve meals or work in the field…

  2. Sailorcurt says:

    BTW I don’t know any PETA members, and honestly I have zero tolerance for them and their nonsense

    Come visit me. I can introduce you to a few…their headquarters is here on the waterfront.

    One of the local radio stations sponsors an annual fishing competition that takes place on the Elizabeth river right outside their building.

    Re the story…If I’m not mistaken, the animals at sea world were raised in captivity. They probably wouldn’t be able to survive in the wild if they were released. If PETA won the case they’d be sentencing them to death.

    Which isn’t surprising really, considering PETA’s record of euthanizing animals turned in to them, rather than finding them homes.

    They’d rather animals be dead than well kept and well fed as pets.

    To be honest, I don’t think PETA cares about animals at all. They care about publicity and the money that the publicity brings in. They’ve got to pay the mortgage on that fancy building and the salaries of all the people that work in it somehow.

  3. Greg Camp says:

    We’ve been informed by the Supreme Court that corporations are people, so perhaps this is the next logical step. We need protestors to hold up a sign requesting us to save lettuce by eating a vegan. Of course, my cats inform me regularly that they are not people. They’re superior to people.

  4. Pyrotek85 says:

    These true believer PETA members are insane. Animals don’t have rights. At all. Zero.

    They are not people, nor are they held legally responsible for their actions.

  5. Joe in PNG says:

    Where’s Tam’s Giant Flying Predator when you need it?

  6. RWC says:

    PETA euthanize’s approximately 85 percent of their ‘slaves.’

    Just sayin’

    • Rob Crawford says:

      They say you should treat animals and people the same. Now consider how they would treat people if they had the power.

  7. So, PETA contends the Founding Fathers meant to include animals in the Constitution? Considering that some of the Founding Fathers were slave owners, you know, of actual HUMAN BEINGS, I find PETA’s arguments ironic to say the least. Oh, and stupid.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      Yep, just like how John Adams and his compatriots totally were invisioning two dudes or two ladies getting married when they drafted the Massachusetts constitution.

      Not that I have any issue with Gay Marriage, but I do have a HUGE problem with the Mass Supreme court and Mitt Romney doing such an abuse of power to push a political agenda.

  8. Kristopher says:

    If humans = animals, then when can I have my very own PETA slave?

    I’ll take one of the pretty ones doing the naked furry protests. It should be fun retraining one to perform domestic “duties”.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      From looking at them, most of the men haven’t seen a hard day’s work in their lives.

      Some of the women are hot if you clean them up and get them to keep their dumb mouths shut…

  9. Linoge says:

    They can have my cats when they pull them from my cold, dead fingers.

    Seriously.

    These fuzzbutts had no idea what to do with the mouse they found a month ago. None at all. Sure, it was a fun toy, but killing at eating it? Completely over their heads. They would not survive a week out in the world, and PETA can piss off if they think they are going to force me to make them.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      I’m sure you heard it, but killing is a learned skill not from instinct, so if Mom doesn’t know, or doesn’t teach the kits how to do the kitteh coup de grace then they have no idea.

      • Greg Camp says:

        That’s what the animal behaviorists claim, but I think that the cats just want to remind us that we are their proper source of food.

        Here’s a quote that I saw on Father Frog’s website:

        There’s no snooze button on a cat that wants breakfast.

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