Seriously Hollywood???

Ok so when watching a youtube video this movie trailer popped up.

Ok Dwayne Johnson, I love him, and Jeffery Dean Morgan, I’m not hitting this skip button.

They keep mentioning the Gorilla’s name being “George”, like that’s supposed to mean something to me, and certainly I’m not catching the names of anybody else here. It’s not a Curious George thing.

Enter the big wolf…..is this some sort of Kaiju movie?

Ok if you’re still reading, and you haven’t seen the trailer, finish it then come back.

OK ready?

Yes it’s a Rampage film! Hollywood is OBSESSED with cashing in on the money that video games bring in that they write screenplays and bring us video games for the big screen. From Super Mario Brothers to Resident Evil to Street Fighter II to Assassin’s Creed, to Final Fantasy and with maybe the exception of Tomb Raider they have ALL been total turds.

OK I really love the Super Mario Brother’s movie, but that’s the sport of watching a train wreck, it is the most fucked-up screenplay, with an OUTSTANDING cast, and of all the video game tie-ins, this might be the most tenuously written script EVER….I was actually surprised to find out that this wasn’t an orphaned script. See SOME movies start out life as a totally different premise, and the studios aren’t excited about producing it….until somebody decided to re-write it into an existing franchise. One example you might have seen in the 4th Die Hard Movie. It was supposed to be a stand-alone cyber-thriller, but was re-written to star John McClain. Hence why a New York cop can fly a Helicopter. It’s also happened a few times in Video Games, most notably (and amusingly both have screen-tie-ins) Super Mario Brother’s 2 and Street Fighter 2010. Both Games were released in Japan as stand-alone titles, but were re-written to loosly tie them into an existing series for marketing.

But no, Super Mario Brothers was written entirely for the Nintendo tie-in! So it might be the most tenuous movie tie-in….until maybe this Rampage film!

So yeah for those too young to remember the old 80s Arcade game.

This was my FAVORITE arcade game of the era. Seriously I bought the Wii Rampage JUST because it has an emulation of the original Arcade game bundled with it. The Wii game is cool, but I mostly just play the old-school game.

So yeah, I may have to go see this even tho I’m going to be shocked if it’s even remotely watchable.