George Lucas is a Hack

So wfgodbold (BTW dude, if you could give me a breakdown of your screenname I’d love to get a better understanding of it) has a post up about the latest abortion George Lucas had done on his magnum opus: Star Wars. Go over here to see some of the changed scenes from the new Blu Ray release.

Of course wfgodbold really does some damage by framing the post with an old Penny Arcade comic that dates back to 2004, and it was before that when Lucas first started hinting to us that maybe the Star Wars trilogy was, in fact, a fluke, when he did the 1997 theatrical re-release of the updated Episode IV. (BTW Mrs. Weer’d and I saw this in the theater years before we started dating). Overall every time George Lucas touches this series he cheapens it.

Its a tough realization, like when I mention M. Night Shyamalan as being a total hack. I know, The Sixth Sense was a DAMN good piece of American film, many will argue, but I really liked Signs as well, tho its not as masterful. The rest of his work has been crap, and I have simply decided to write him off as a total hack. Its a shame, but still. Still compare him with contemporaries like Christopher Nolan, David Fincher, and PT Anderson, and it looks like Night just made a lucky shot. Same with Lucas.

Now I also wanted to share an amusing observation. Mrs. Weer’d has epilepsy, and it appears that seizures cause some disruption with turning short-term memory into long-term memory. Thankfully that’s not much of a problem with her epilepsy so well controlled.

Still the other day I asked her to give a plot summary of Star Wars Episodes 1-3. She couldn’t. Don’t you envy her?

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0 Responses to George Lucas is a Hack

  1. North says:

    Someone with vastly better drawing skills than I should make a t-shirt. You know the profile view monkey-to-man evolution picture? When I see this I think of one with Darth Vader on the left, and Howard the Duck on the right.

    Geo, man, leave Star Wars alone. If you want to fuck around, spend your time on Twice Upon a Time.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      Or Howard the Duck THX Remastered edition…now with CGI Duck Tits!

      I wish they’d re-release that on DVD just so I can see it again. I remember laughing my ass off as a boy….but then again duck tits and fart jokes were the apex of my humor back then.

  2. bluesun says:

    My friend who spends much more time than I on movies and the like has been known to say that “George Lucas is the only director who can’t be trusted with his own legacy.” I’m not sure if he’s the only one, but he certainly made some of my favorite childhood memories who then butchered them…

  3. wfgodbold says:

    The Lucas flap gets even more ridiculous; in 1988, he testified before Congress against altering films.

    I guess that was before he figured out he could sell the same film in successive editions for full price; it’s practically a license to print money!

    Especially since the fans bitch and moan about it, and then give him their money anyway.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      I did give Lucas one last payment when he was smart enough to box up the DVD set of Start Wars films in two sets of two rather than all 6, and he included one of his horrible renditions, but also the first THX print that is my personal favorite as it was the least messed-with, but improved from the Laserdisc Print in sound and picture.

      Now I’m fucking done, if we go to a non-disk format like MP3s I’ll just rip the THX films and invite George to suck my cock.

      But yeah, as horrible as the “Remastered” editions have been, George has been rewarded for each and every folly with boatloads of money.

  4. bgeek says:

    Lucas isn’t a total hack. He should’ve just been chained to the tech departments to developed better special effects, so he wouldn’t get his hands on any of the writing/directing/distribution aspects of the films.

  5. Bubblehead Les says:

    Remember the “South Park” episode from a few years back where Lucas and Spielberg were “Taken to the Woodshed” over Indiana Jones 4?

    Of course, I could never figure out why Lucas waited 25 YEARS to finish the Series! My friends Dad died while waiting for it to come out.

    But he’d probably have keeled over when he saw Jar Jar Binks, anyway….

    • Weerd Beard says:

      I’ll just say that I’m very glad to hear that Orson Welles died before Transformers hit the theaters.

      To go from Citizen Kane and the biggest name in Radio to that turd is sad, and I’m glad Orson never saw his last gasp.

      • wfgodbold says:

        Don’t forget the travesty that was the first Street Fighter live action movie; it was so bad it killed Raul Julia.

        • Weerd Beard says:

          Oh wow, I forgot about that clothes-hanger abortion! Dunno if Raul lived to see the end of that bomb, but I’d be pleased to hear that that AMAZING actor was either too dead, or too sick to see the film.

          Certainly you can tell Raul was knocking on heaven’s door as he swam around in that foolish red jumpsuit.

  6. Matt says:

    George Lucas is simply the latest installment of the Howard Hughes paradox. Every American secretly, somewhere in his heart, wishes he were rich and powerful enough to get away with being that crazy and self-destructive.

    Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, George Lucas was a pretty good writer. Had some cool ideas, and personally pushed forward the state of the art in SFX technology in order to realize those ideas on film. In the process, he made so much money and acquired so many groupies that it’s been 30 years since the last time someone who sincerely disagreed with him was able to thwart his will in even the smallest particular.

    Trust me…if you could somehow grow even richer while spending 3 decades completely ignoring anyone who told you that one or more of your ideas was shit…well, the bell curve representing your ongoing idea output would pretty naturally shift in a brown-ish direction.

  7. Kevin Baker says:

    Some time back I watched a brilliant dissection of the Star Wars prequel trilogy that made the explicit point that you COULD NOT give a plot summary of those films. Nor could you describe the characters in them in any words not directly related to their physical appearance. They weren’t characters, they were animated cardboard cutouts spouting wood-pulp dialog.

    I purchased the DVD set of the “original theatrical release” versions of Episodes IV, V and VI. I have not nor will I ever purchase the prequel films in any format, nor will I ever purchase Lucas’s “director’s cuts” of the original trilogy.

    • Weerd Beard says:

      Nor was there any backstory on WHY the Empire was bad given in the films. Some of the books and fanfictions give some horrible shit the Empire did, but in the film the Empire is hated because they’re THE EMPIRE…and most of the actors are British…

      Really Star Wars is just a collage of popular myths, plot outlines, and screenplays written by great directors (the whole first act of Ep IV is The Hidden Fortress by Kurosawa)

      Again, H A C K!

  8. North says:

    Dear George Lucas,

    Please stop changing Star Wars before the Star Wars Christmas Special starts to look good.

    This Galaxy

  9. George Lucas says:

    I have altered the original series. Pray I don’t alter them any´╗┐ further.

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