Do not Care

On the Gay Test the comments over at Uncle’s got me thinking about some of my answers.

Its not gay or straight that I just don’t care about a lot of things. Ask me about Name brands, I could care less outside of a few items (like Knives, Guns, vacuum cleaners, and Cars). I have no idea who makes messenger bags, and I think they’re kinda lame anyway, a backpack is much more comfortable to lug around. The Back Pack I use in my day-to-day is made by LL Bean. Why Bean? Because Dad works there during the holiday season and bought it for me for dirt cheap. I have a lot of LL Bean stuff because of that. I also had a lot of Nike Sneakers because until recently my Uncle worked for them.

I cut my own hair. Why? Because I have zero desire for any odd styling. I buy a $30 trimmer, I buzz my hair down to 8mm, my beard to half-an-inch (sometimes longer, sometimes shorter depending on the weather and my mood) and I do this once a month. When the trimmer dies, I toss it and buy a new one. The last time I got my hair cut by somebody accepting cash was for my wedding, might be the last time I do that before I’m at the convalescence home.

When I first moved in with my soon-to-be wife she did a load of laundry and tossed out all my socks and underwear that had holes in them. Realizing she may have crossed a line she approached me cautiously.

Her: “When I was doing laundry I decided to throw away your socks and underwear that had holes, I hope you didn’t mind”
Me: “Nope”
Her: “Well it was like 5 pairs of each so you might want to get more.”
Me: “Oh yeah, good idea”
Me: “Where does one GET socks and underwear?”

I wasn’t being coy, I honestly had no idea. I have since learned, socks, underwear, and 90% of my clothes come from two locations: Christmas, and Birthdays!

Yep, Mom and Dad, and the Wife will usually secure me some socks and underwear as well as sundry clothes that they know I like (seriously I’m not hard to shop for) and that has me covered for another year. Usually more as I end up having to send off older stuff, or stuff I don’t like as much to charities.

I’m sure there are gay guys who give as little a shit about such things as I do. Hell I knew a gay guy who didn’t know how to cook…not hamburgers, not Mac N Cheese. I cook most meals on the weeknight at Casa De Weer’d, So on that metric I’m WAYYY gayer than him….or something.

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0 Responses to Do not Care

  1. mike w. says:

    Yup, It’s just a silly test. Besides, it’s not like there’s something terribly wrong with being gay

    I mean hell, I was at dinner down the beach last weekend and two guys standing at the bar were kissing eachother. Now, I’d rather not see two guys making out, but honestly, what difference does it make to my life?

    I place the whole “Eww, Gay Cooties” crowd in the MYOFB category. Get over it, quit imposing your morals on others and work on your own life.

    That said, I do give my dad shit for wearing pink shirts & penny loafers šŸ™‚

  2. wrm says:

    Yea well and in the Hippie test doing the rounds a few weeks ago I scored around 30%. Because I recycle (my earthworms hafta eat too, and my brother gets a killer deal on empty wine bottles) and probably because I like tattoos.


    Yea, I cook. I even cook quiche. (OK, it’s Brigid’s “take a pound of bacon” recipe, but still). I don’t mind kissing, hell, there are guys *I* would kiss (like, right after he says “you have won the $5 million jackpot”…). And if you like to watch girls kissing, you don’t really have the moral high ground objecting to guys doing the same. Coming to think of it, worst combination is heterosexual teenagers. When it’s your daughter in the living room. Your *fertile* daughter. But anywayz.

    I useta have a barber. Damn, he could make me look pretty. Damnfool retired. OK, first time he cut my hair, I was like three, so I guess he had a good run. But still. Havn’t managed to wear the Wahl out yet, it works well.

    And the test? I gave up when there was no “WTF’s a gym” option (I happen to like Barolo, that makes me a wine snob, not gay šŸ™‚

  3. Jake says:

    Iā€™m sure there are gay guys who give as little a shit about such things as I do.

    [raises hand]

    I cook a little, and even experiment sometimes, but most of my dining is fast food, microwave, or throw-it-in-the-oven frozen.

    I go to the barber shop down the street from the office for my haircut (getting the back of my neck shaved myself is a PITA, and I do keep a little length rather than buzzing it). They charge $9 and I usually just hand them a $10 and let them keep the change.

    I don’t really use a backpack, since I get free messenger bags just about every year at the Virginia EMS Symposium. Why would I buy one?

    Sneakers are usually Reeboks because I need the arch support. For work (dress) shoes I’m pretty picky because I subscribe to the philosophy that “cheap shoes are a false economy.” For black, I have the Air Force dress shoes I got while I was in Civil Air Patrol 16-17 years ago (which I also used for marching band in high school) – they were about $90-$100 at the time, and that was with the discount we got. My brown/oxblood shoes were cheap and died about a year ago, and I’m still holding out for some wingtips – but I can’t find them in that color when I can afford them, and I can’t afford them when I do find them (dang it!). Now I just need to find a shoe repair shop somewhere local. It’s getting time to re-heel my black shoes again.

    BTW, socks and underwear come from Wally World. Though the underwear site they mentioned was pretty interesting. šŸ˜€

    It is a silly test, though.

  4. Thomas says:

    There was a gay fellow at one of my employs many decades ago. He wasn’t in the closet but you never would have picked him for much of anything unusual. Was a managerial sort and wore a coat and tie the same as the straight managers his age, liked to watch football and go fishing…But if you didn’t know you wouldn’t have guessed by his tastes or behaviors…tack on he had tried to be straight at one point in his youth and had an ex-wife and a daughter he doted on, both of them, actually. Wasn’t really animosity in their divorce, was just a mistake because he hadn’t come to terms with what/who he was.

    On the other hand: I worked with a seriously closeted (he thought) gay fellow and he decided to come out and he was really shocked when everybody he came out to said “Yeah, we knew…” because he did a lot of stereotypical “flamer” stuff. I think what I said to him was “did you finally figure out you were gay or did you just decide to stop pretending not to be? You weren’t doing a very good job of pretending.” He had a habit of looking at handsome young male customers in the way that I’m not supposed to leer at women in work environments šŸ™‚

    • Weerd Beard says:

      Knew a few gay guys like that, and a few Lesbians who you’d never guess they went that way. People are too complicated to judge things in such ways.

      Hell when I was introduced to a girl I ended up dating in college she asked our mutual friend quietly aside “Is he a Theater Major?”

      I also have a cock flute on my desk! šŸ˜‰

  5. next time save the tighty whiteys for rags. They’re very soft.

    1. Cut off the elastic, (or at least cut through the elastic so it does not get back into rotation)
    2. (optional) cut into pieces that don’t resemble underwear

    • Weerd Beard says:

      Cut mine into bore patches! T-shirts, light-colored underwear (I have a lot of dark colored boxer-briefs, which make telling if the bore is clean harder to tell) and old bedsheets and pillow cases all get made into bore patches.

  6. Dev says:

    I LOL’ed!

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